They all think that it’s pretty obvious that i’m Soveriegnly ordained to be in Virginia at the moment, and i have to laugh and tell them they’re right. painfully so.
There are so many moments here that i am thankful for.
Watching Renita hold an Iraqi baby and eating the graham crackers we are served at Hend’s house, washed down our throats with syrupy chai.
Finding that the road has merged with the creek, and nervously plowing through without stalling the car, even though a short little man is watching the entire thing with big round eyes and a rather grimly set jaw.
Riding all the way to Lynchburg with Aaliyah and eating popcorn with Eliana before they get shipped off to the next foster home.
…..There are so many of these moments. and i love them. or the people in them.
Before my family and i stuffed the trailer full of years’ worth of belongings, I’d yanked weeds out of the Michigan garden, sat on the patio under the moon, and walked the shores of lake Michigan, thinking hard about the implications of moving here with them.
I asked God to give me a car to use if I’m supposed to actually live here for any amount of time. Around the same time, Dad told me that i’m welcome to use his car for awhile.
okay, i thought, not exactly what i was envisioning, but this works. for now…….
More recently, as i’m getting pulled deeper and deeper into life here, I’ve been driving Dad’s groaning little Subaru all over the hilly countryside, and praying that it wouldn’t give out while i’m driving it because i didn’t want to pour my savings account into the aged little motor.
About two weeks ago i was on the way home from an evening with my people in Charlottesville and feeling desperate about my transportation issue. I knew i couldn’t keep tying up Dad’s vehicle every day, and i knew i couldn’t really afford to buy a decent one, and i really would rather speak other languages than English, and ride city buses rather than drive, and besides….AM i even supposed to be here in this sterile country where we throw away good things and shiver over baby cockroaches ????? So in one last desperate prayer, i told God that i’m going to need my own car, or then I’ll basically know i’m supposed to leave Virginia.
i got to Bible Study late that evening, and sat in a nearly empty row, totally exhausted; and continued to think thoughts that may or may not have fit into the ”mustard seed quality” category. i don’t remember much from what they were studying.
The very next day Freeman casually sat behind his desk and told me that a friend of his had decided to donate a car. to me.
The donor-man had never met me..and freeman did not know about my demanding prayer.
I didn’t even journal about it, because the guy still hadn’t dropped off the car and I wasn’t quite sure if i believed it.
Several days later our car load of girls swung in at the Ice Cream Parlour, and.. behold the 20 year old car with a skinny pink streak running down its entire length.
I just stood there, laughing incredulously but wanting desperately to cry.
And so i drive a car that is nearly as old as i am. As i fumble with the seat belt and sometimes go too slow because, i guess cruise was none existent 20 years ago[? ], i shiver sometimes and smile and just….. thank my God.
Who knows. and cares. in personal ways. like whether i need a car or whether i should be teaching among the hills of Virginia.
…….. If you need me I’ll be eating pastries with my Syrians or giving Lana journaling prompts.